Friday, December 30, 2011

Standing on the crestfallen balcony adoring the emblazoned city
The ruins of a great civilization now burn producing a somber glow
The smoke dances to great heights as a symbol of the passionate triumph
My gaze drifts toward the placidity in the distance, savouring the fiery fate below and its ashen existence
For so long I have felt like a man with no eyes, feeling his way through a vast open space, occasionally gripping onto something malleable. Each malleable form would be such a great relief, but feeling it would only ease my being for a brief length of time, I had to keep feeling , and the search for objects kept getting more and more difficult. It was exhausting searching for the next object, but I recently came to terms with my innate blindness, I no longer need to touch an object to feel it.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

The dichotomous decentralisation of intelligent relation decries absolutist formulaic formation

Friday, December 23, 2011

Not Eyed

Through the intricate folds weaved
An exquisite glow had been achieved
Fraying the knots, untying his reprieve
Delaying the rot, death ill conceived
Avoiding tantalized self strangle
Destroys his aggrandizement, untangled
Whilst in free fall his psyche dangled
Relying on support from a strained angel
Fate pries his rapport from chained hell
A sated sigh in retort, estranged, fell

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

I was lost in in the maze of life
Caught in a doleful, fazed strife
Couldn't tell wrong from right
Pleasure from slight

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

A wandering Man
Free and confined
To colours blind
Blind to the world he flees
He hesitantly heeds
The established decrees
The man still
Desires that thrill
He must resist
Or his path will be missed
Desist desist desist
He persists
He knows it to be destructive
And yet the self seductive
Still echoes in his thoughts
In the sphere of disaster
The Man's future rots
Solvent time his master

The Man was always observing
Adoring their spinning, entrancing
Intrigued by their jubilant air
Their lives danced as ribbons without care
Their dance ethereal, espousing tragic times
They still had faith in their kind
Though to him, hopelessly left behind
Such allure could not be designed
The man vowed to abide by their ways
To release his cynical role, a watchman of strays
He is prevented by isolating distaste
He must always be the stranger in face
A dichotomy between the Man and his Place
For once you perceive existence's source
The chase is impossible without remorse.

The Man glanced longingly at the night sky
A lethargic evening spent pondering why
His existence continues still, which solicits a sordid sigh
The conclusion not to be heard
For it is a beautiful illusion, even if absurd
The man becomes one by loving the starry scape
Feeling the light embrace, his solemn escape
Knowing full well his meaning is null
He has an undying passion which resists the cull
To rejoin with the abyss, he overcomes the rift
His sole comfort provided by the expansive collective
Untempered by the pensive perspective
The Man rests his eyes and sees clearly
The origin of his self; Scepsis, serenely subsides to weary
Embalming dreams cushion his descent into Celestia, nearly
The man glanced longingly at the night sky
He spent many long evenings pondering why
His existence had come to this moment in time
The conclusion is not meant to be heard
For it is a beautiful illusion, even if absurd
The man becomes one by sharing with the starry scape
Feeling the warm embrace, his solemn escape
Knowing full well his meaning is null
He has an undying passion which resists the cull
To rejoin with the abyss, he overcomes the rift
He is comforted by the universal collective
Untempered by the beautiful perspective
The man closes his eyes and sees clearly
The origin of his self, which slowly subsides to weary
Calming dreams cushion his descent into Celestia, nearly
The man was always there
Watching them spin like they always have
Intrigued by their jubilant attitude
Their lives danced as if attached with ribbons
They danced even despite tragic times
They still had faith in their own kind
Even though to him they were left behind
Such a beauty could not be designed
The man wishes he could go and join them
And release his burdensome role of watchman
He is prevented by an unseen force
One which cannot be explained through discourse
A cold barrier as if to keep him in place
For once you see how something exists
It becomes impossible to give chase
Negative mind
Charged and confined
To the colours he is blind
For the world he bleeds
Questionable steed
With minimal needs
And yet the man still
Desires that thrill
He must resist
Or his life will be missed
Desist desist desist
And yet he persists
He knows it is self destructive
And yet he cannot prevent the seductive
Influence from controlling his thoughts
In the sphere of disaster
The man's future rots
Solvent time his master

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Why is that I am not afraid of death
But I cower when faced with life
I just want to rest
I keep living but I receive no rewards
It is difficult when the fatigue never wards
There is no meaning in life
But then why am I leaning towards death
Which has even less significance
Which would pay out equal dividends
The only difference is the mean of ends
I need to choose between death or life
For hovering between is a voracious vice
A vain grip so tight
Dark anguishing insight
Night vanquishing light
A silent shift of red rites

Friday, November 18, 2011

I want to guide them all into the right
Whenever I coax them toward the light
Every time they recoil in fright
Such a sorry sight, contrite
Ignorance is such a bliss it's a plight

I need to escape this place
Find a journey not a race
It is not about the pace
Nor clout , but grace
A life fulfilled in taste

Monday, November 14, 2011

It's easy fall into the spiraling pattern of delusion
That your depression is the center of all confusion
This is an illusion
I truly wish to find an escape
I grip onto my life so relentlessly
That I have deep scrapes
Down to the bone
Perhaps best to let go
But strong is the fear of dying alone
Without sharing my perceptions
Dying unknown
For if I do not share my conceptions
With another who might care
It is indiscernible
If I was ever there

Saturday, November 12, 2011

The grey corruption has spread to my dreamscape
My final escape from this vain fate, raped


A majority of abnormality
Modality,triviality,banality
Validity for venality and vapidity
The audacity

The duality of mentality
Partiality, neutrality

Universality of morality
Irrationality pursued
By voracity and veracity

Potentiality of geniality
Now fallacy in actuality
The reality of totality

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Life is simply the product of inertia
A type of havoc with illusory future
A cut that cannot be healed with sutures
A depressed rut , kneeled before searchers
Movement that is not displacement
True intent, clot of defacement
Longing for sentient symmetry
Belonging to no ministry
Crawling systematically towards misery
Intentionally falling into a whole mad mystery

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Oh death, you are so intellectually tempting while shrinking
Lest I mar this life with fatal thinking
Or decompose my organs with frivolous drinking
It seems like a chore to stay alive
Teems with boredom and lies
Perhaps there is more to be had, in life
As fared, no score for a young lad, without strife
To be dealt a good hand, is no more to say
Having felt love, only to have it torn away
Why does a wanderer tread to stay
In an endless sea of forsaken grey?
A constant struggle with this question
Every day

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Absolutism is dissolute, morose and minute
Capitalism constitutes slavery, in a verbose collude
Risen, the few savory, dream to depose the crude
A vision, delude, for wavering are the brood
While dissidence is renewed, rival dissonance strength proved
The dissidents, obtuse, feel defiled, so roam great lengths, defused

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Free me
From these organic chains

Let me wander
Without constrains

Celestially maunder
On conscious plains

Free me
From this suit of disdain

To dolefully dance
With the acidic rain

Rain until my resolve
Dissolves and I abstain

Abstain from the valley of solace
Solace void with chains

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Remnants

Dotingly embraced by time
Floating on pace with cloud nine
Soaring to heights that go unclimbed
Adoring sights that glow, sublime

Fury and misery combined
An illusory equilibrium, benign
Fated to face serenity, defined
Abated the race to infinity, declined
Belated affinity between body and mind
An existence purely posed, refined

Designed merely
Shined dreams, dearly
Bound, from weary
Sound, from dreary
Found bound, clearly
The renowned profound, teary

Old kind
Hold me divine
Wholly intertwined
Fully mine

A scene so pristine
Relatively obscene
A tentative being
Confronting and fleeing
Presenting and feeling
Dissenting and kneeling
Rational and insane
Sensational and inane

Careens from plain
To the altered plane
A faltered train
Of faulty thought
Inspired the feign brain
Conspired in vain
To be sought
By a fraught
Absolutist plot
Destined, not

Omega by alpha pulled
Emerging impalpable
Beginning from end
Thinning the bland rend
Forgetting, faking the pretend
For this serene friend
Reality does bend

On drastic-plastic-elastic mends
A fantastic phantasm depends

Friday, October 14, 2011

The essential rule

Innate

You must love yourself

Not berate

To feel love

Towards an immaculate

Reciprocal

Mate

So how to compensate

For self hate

Of which

You can neither escape

Nor abate

Perhaps just

Miserable fate

For now

Wait

A dream to create

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

A whole world defiled
A whole race in denial
Imploring to be worthwhile
Humanity is putrid, vile
My throat burned by bile
Their existence I abhor
Hatred floods out of every pore
Desensitised to the decynicised
The naive flies are to be despised

Friday, October 7, 2011

I live my life as if I were a cloud
Floating from place to place observing the crowd
But in this society being aloof is not allowed
This reality just feels too much like a dream
The world is too much for me
I have to escape this existence
Avoid interactions with the cretins
Even so, I feel like this is just pittance
To death I offer no resistance
If only you people would listen
We wouldn't have such a menace

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Opacity of the night
Perturbed, unfurls
To a seldom sight
The darkening curls
Around the disturbed soul
Who cries out in whole
Why do I exist?
Awaits an ail
To lift the fatal veil
Echoes in the mist
To no avail
Lost in the abyss

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Freedom: The power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint.
A noble concept
Wars for freedom, freedom of career choice, talk-shows on freedom.
But is that true freedom? Or is it illusory? Could it even be the anti-thesis?
True freedom is living in the present, with no restrictions controlling your future, and without the future controlling your present.
Who could give up their home, savings, job, family, friends in order to pursue a free life?

You may have seen an Outsider in your lifetime. The Outsiders, they go from place to place, town to town. They float around with no attachments or restrictions.

"Can someone like that truly be happy? They have no futures! No career! No hope!?"

But maybe there exists a type of person who doesn't need a future, a traditional career, or even hope. What is to hope for anyways , the future? Outsiders live for the present, they have no use of a future. The freedom of being able to do whatever you wish at any time, whether that be to work on a ship, travel the country, write a book, or just relax in a quiet town, at a moments notice. To Outsiders, this freedom in the present is more important than having a "secure" future. If you aren't enjoying your current lifestyle but you convince yourself that it's for the future, that's quite naive, unless of course you can guarantee the future will be fulfilling. But you are never actually in the future, you are always in the now. You're now right now, and you're now 10,20,30, years from now. The future is always then, never now. The future is always a goal, but when you reach that goal, many feel empty and need to find a new goal to work towards. A constant struggle to trick yourself into existing.

Some may actually find this lifestyle bearable but don't be so ignorant to assume that this is the only lifestyle possible. Don't claim that Outsiders must have a problem of some sorts if they wish for something different. This brief introduction leads into a major problem that many face in this world. A world made of money, money spins the world around, again and again. Some people hate this system, but cannot escape it. Capitalism's effects are far reaching, so far in fact that you can't ever escape them. You can try to live completely isolated, but it's futile, impossible.

Ted Kaczynski was a prodigal student, everything was going perfect for him as some would interpret! He graduated high school early, had a great offer to study at Harvard when he was merely 16. He published great works and was the top of his class. He even got a job as a professor right out of university! Everything was perfect, a seamless life! He could do this for the next FORTY YEARS until retirement.

The problem with working this long is that many who live this way are too tired to do anything else with their life afterward. They burn out, or are too old and sickly to do what they truly wanted after they retire. They squandered their entire lives working at a job, that they may or may not enjoy. They spent their entire lives working for what? Money? They won't ever have enough, you see it in the extremely rich all the time. They keep purchasing ridiculously expensive cars,houses,jewelry,drugs and even spouses. They keep trying to fill their emptiness with money, but it will never fill the hole inside them no matter how much they purchase. Absurd.

Ted realized some time into his teaching "career" that this lifestyle was not for him, he was an Outsider, he desired freedom and isolation, true freedom.True freedom can never be however, as he would learn like so many others before him, the hard way. He moved to a secluded woods, constructing his own cabin by hand, and surviving self-sufficiently with knowledge he gained from various survival books. He spent his days relaxing, reading and traveling to a tranquil waterfall, a venture that took 2-3 days walking from his cabin. One day he went to this oasis and on the way back, his escape from the vain race we call humanity, his forest, was being torn apart by the expansion of "civilization". He snapped, his one escape from the world was stripped from him. His one solemn grace had been defiled by the people he wanted so much to get away from. You can never escape capitalism. He was trapped in their world, cornered. He vowed to get back at them, at the parasites who ruined his only hope, and went on to kill three people. This was his transition from Ted to the Una-bomber. He was a genius, he could have murdered upwards of 1000s. He merely wanted an outlet for his stress, stress caused by the flawed world he existed in.

Many fall victim to this world like Ted had, but they are ignored and forgotten. "There truly is no escape from this rat race!" is what Outsiders cry out. Perhaps in 10000 years the human race will actually become something worthy of mention, but for the meantime it seems we are not too differentiable from our not-so-distant relatives, the monkeys. We merely have technology, that is the only thing that differs us truly from animals. Is our existence really that different? We kill, rape, steal, does that sound civilized? You can argue that this is an extreme generalization, but you cannot argue against the fact that when people or animals, when pushed into a corner, are capable of anything. When an individual is threatened, there is the fight or flight response. In this world you cannot flee capitalism and are forced to fight. Many Outsiders simply lash out at the world indiscriminately, as capitalism is not a material form, only a formation from materialism. There is no choice for the Outsiders when pushed into the corner of existence.


We need to avoid pushing people into the corners of civilization, avoid turning a blind eye to those who abstain from the vain. Hoping the issue simply disappears just causes the situation to deteriorate, we're still here whether you can accept it or not. Humanity needs to address those who wish to transcend our absurd lifestyles. The coming years will only get worse, as capitalism forces the disparity to grow between the rich and the poor.

It is an absolute truth that in a capitalistic society, there will always be the rich exploiting the poor. No exceptions. Lenin noticed this and attempted to rectify the world by creating a state where equality would be prevalent, he died before his goal could be completed and due to many hardships imposed by both the capitalist nations in power and nature itself his system was never realized. Lenin wanted all of the workers in the world to unite and overthrow their capitalist dictators. He wanted to free the third world from the first worlds deathly grip, he wanted the workers in the first world, who are only slightly better off than the third world compared to their capitalist overlords, to also come to arms against capitalism. Corporate America was the leading force in the propaganda to prevent this revolution, they demonized communism and even held an appalling series of events extremely similar to the Salem witch hunt. They slander every wrong move the communist party makes while downplaying their own systems sickening evils like the Bhopal disaster, daily starvation caused by disparity, and the countless foreign governments toppled by the imperialist west. The capitalists in power wanted to prevent at all costs, a revolution that would debunk their precious pyramid scheme.

There are many issues with humanity, the main current one is money, especially the divination of money. We are by-products of this obsession with materialism. Many worship money as they would a god. In fact, the people who advocate the existence of god, worship money. It is no coincidence that the Vatican City is so wealthy. In a world where such madness exists, what options does an Outsider, who does not perceive money as a suitable life goal, have? The answer is nothing! Money is ubiquitous, we cannot fight it alone, we cannot even ignore it, since everywhere you run to leads you to a different brand of capitalism or the fallout of capitalism.


It all comes down to money and power. Every single problem with humanity comes down to this. So, how can we eliminate these things? It's simple and yet excruciatingly difficult, due to inherent human stupidity. We must abolish capitalism in its entirety as a first step. There will never be a perfect economic system until we achieve post-scarcity, no system is a perfect replacement. This does not mean we must continue propagating a system that is inherently evil. The people that would advocate the preservation of this system of torture are the few not receiving any torture or are even performing it themselves. They will manipulate, bribe, and even kill to preserve their seat in power. Most were merely born into power and money, into the direct filth of corruption straight from their mother's womb, they did not corrupt the world themselves. This is not their failure, this is the failure of humanity and the system in which we live. The only reason capitalism exists to this day can be related to the Allegory of the Cave phenomenon. This is all people know, they only know capitalism, they know nothing else, anything new is frightening to them. Capitalism does not need "reform", it does not need a "reset", it needs total annihilation. The system itself demands it, ethics demand it, and the people demand it, or they would if they could escape their insignificant daily lives for a single moment. The constant bombardment of entertainment and false information sees to it that this does not happen.

"What will help?" Peaceful protest, violent protest, but ultimately, we need to spread knowledge, specifically knowledge of this new type of existence. We need to end ignorance. Ignorance is a cancer, slowly eating away at our world. This is the inherent flaw of humanity. Cognitive dissonance makes sure of this. It takes an extremely strong individual to come to terms with the realization that humanity's entire existence is one without a purpose or direction. Few individuals can accept this, the ones who cannot are forced to simply/complexly dismiss it. You can't blame the weak for being weak, we as the strong didn't work for our intelligence and resilience, we were simply picked out to be the intelligent by random chance, the lottery of genetics. Many can improve their worth by seeking knowledge. So, how do we get the weak to believe this harsh reality? Dissonance only exists when it goes against their ideals, it is ideal to fit in among their peers. The solution is spreading knowledge, the ignorant will follow the enlightened as long as they are in a position of numbers and strength. So we must gather our numbers and become a majority, everyone else will follow suit in our revolution, whether or not they can comprehend our motives. The irony of this is that to transcend our stupidity, we must exploit it. The world is truly madness at its core.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Outsider Inured

I am an inhuman parasite
I want your existence out of sight
I exist to corrupt this world
I exist to paint these evil murals
I exist to feed off of your feeble morals
They are outdated and expired
They are ill-fated and undesired
I will create a reality without you
I will use your own morality against you
The problem with empathy
Is that it leaves people like me empty
It forces me into a state of captivity
The only solution is the polar of passivity
Come prepared when my teeth are bared
For this lust, this urge, grants me the power to devour this world, purged
When there is nothing left to corrupt
When there are no more lives to disrupt
Only then will my true form erupt
My dormant self will have eternal time
To once again, become the true divine


Goodbye
Prodigy sheen
Amphetamine fiend
Pristine dreams
Clean screams
Teen scenes
Obscene means
Fleeing beings
Decree of the keen
Predatory careens
Perfect preen
Only when truly alone
Will I be free to roam
Only then will my true self
Be free to be shown
No need to atone
For a sin I didn't hone
Until I am alone
Until there exist no others
Will I ever shed these covers

The temporary states of alone at my transient home
Allow the weight of the world to fall off my bones
I cannot fathom the amount of release I would feel
If true solitude would become real, eternal peace
I cannot escape the effects of humanity
I am certain that my state is insanity
But only because my reality
Does not match their vanity
Whenever their disgusting existence comes to mind
I wish to banish in entirety, their kind

It's empowering to be alone

It's devouring to be alone

Friday, September 30, 2011

Gasoline veins
Sparked to enlighten
Philosophy tightened
He who lives and dies illuminated
Alternatively acclimated
Perseverance into night
Despite light fright
Moth to flame
Who's to blame?

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Feed me knowledge
I will emanate power
For in this world
The ignorant are devoured

Monday, September 26, 2011

I am on the path to redemption
Well, not quite, that's a deception
All I truly seek is to relieve this tension
The alternate routes are not worthy of mention

I shall try to rekindle my essence
Find a cure to this pestilence
Maybe I truly do need repentance
Or is it another trick to just end this?

I cannot know any more
My self was lost long ago
Will it come back I do not know
Will I adopt a new shell for show
Will I obtain a new lifestyle
I need to be alone
For a while
Their congruence
Will never be
Without my happiness

My happiness
Will never be
Without solace

My solace
Will never be
Without solitude

My solitude
Will never be
Without platitude

My platitude
Will never be.
Destitute

The only way for me to survive
Is for myself to commit suicide
The only obstacle being
I am not ready to die
I am not ready for them to cry
I am not ready to decide
I cannot bear with this tear inside

So I will go on
Nothing will change
I will continue pushing this boulder
A constant struggle, estranged
Constantly looking over my shoulder
Wishing I could love and hold "her"

This is how I will spend the remainder of my days

Sunday, September 25, 2011

In Justice

I will go out in a blaze of glory
Ignoring the cave and the allegory
Stated simply, a stoic story
Well aware of those who will abhor me
But even so, there exist many who'll adore me
And their betters, those who will outscore me

I have nothing to lose
And everything to prove
Sending a statement of seething hate
That will melt the current state
Feared to be, is that fickle fable, fate

An army of absurd animals
Against the gods in suits
Consumers of forbidden fruits
We chose this hell
The demons will be felled

From the tops of towers
They will rain in freedom showers
Humanity's finest hours
The will to power
For this fatal moment
The world is ours

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Fiery scene in my gaze
I remain unfazed
I see the horizon
My life is alive
A bird flies in
Not just surviving
No more downsizing
Mark the world
With masterful incising
Memorize your design
Never forget the benign
For in this dimension
All are worthy of mention
An epiphany
Simple naivity

I lost myself
I saved my life

I never surmised
Myself, self-despised

In order to fulfill my goal
I had become what I hated
I nearly lost my soul
For the meanwhile the new self is abated
Even though it makes no sense I truly wish
To become the same boy that I was before this
I always felt the way I was becoming was amiss
The boy was always tugging at my conscience
Like a child attaining attention from its cold parents

I won't ignore him any more
This is in order to avoid becoming something I abhor
Goodbye Michael,
This is where I close the door,
I no longer need to settle a score
I found something more

Non omnis moriar

Monday, September 12, 2011

My conscience won't respond, my only correspondent
My life seems prolonged, an existence despondent
I grip onto irrelevancies to preserve an expired meaning
I slip into futility, leaving me to a tired reality, dreaming

I long for a purpose in this world
A sphere worthless, fetal and curled
Can there exist a mutual mind for the undefined?
Obscure thought, with no sign of becoming benign

I wish to become an entity in another plane
Repeating chores for validity seems insane
Spinning the wheel of life, to admire how far you've come
Expanding your fief, despite the world being a zero sum

I implore you to save me from this world of grey
I desperately try to find a reason, but it is nearing the day
Where I no longer have the will, to impose my stay
Such an appeasing thought, I continue to fray

Time flows on, as if to convey
It doesn't matter, either way

Saturday, September 10, 2011

My conscience keeps spiraling inward
I can't save myself from this darkness
I can't resist the temptations forever
Please anyone save my soul
I can't feel anything but a hole
I feel like I'm going out of control
Something inside me I cannot withhold
Rearing its head as if to say "No more old"
It just needs a release, an escape
I fear it can't be coaxed away from its fate
The walls close around me I have no choice
I want to scream but I have no voice
I cannot cry I cannot die
I let out an ambiguous sigh
Michael won't you sleep?
To allow your conscience a moment to weep?
No of course not, that would be admitting defeat.
Delusions of grandeur control you, a fleeting feat

Won't you open your heart for us?
Don't you have something to discuss?
I thought I was someone you could trust
I saw your heart sink into the ocean
You didn't even make a commotion

Could this be the tides of a hard lesson?
The knowledge that your contrived pain would never lessen?
I know you believe the solution is solitude
But you must realize that answer is crude
Yes, even though for the meantime you can only brood
In the depths of your mind you do require the same food

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

I need it to live

The moments come one by one
The times when I become the polar of Eros
Unavoidable like the death of the Pharaohs
I force myself to slow, in order to soak up the upcoming show

It's an unshakable insatiable lust, one which renders me incapable of trust
I fear and fawn over the inevitable inability to control myself, even though I must
A hunger so severe I cannot tell how far my carnal consumption will go
A fraudulent, vacillating reality, phasing in and out, to and fro

Every time I try to become a person
My cruel condition seems to worsen
An impossible, crushing burden

I stare into my lifeless eyes
I search for the answer
To why everyone dies
But they are filled with lies
Each being an Iris I despise
Hatred linked to the inability to cry

I occasionally forget to resist death
Perhaps for the best
Yes, a world without me, one less

It ends abruptly
Although no one can disrupt me
I regain my self
Discard the marred memory to the solitary shelf
Until next time
The emaciated ending of the subhuman sublime

Saturday, September 3, 2011

I guess I am a loner
Heading down a stray path
To try and find the greener grass
No happiness ever lasts
So I try to live in the past
I want to experience love
And feel my soul fly so high above
I wait for that feeling to come
But it never does

So I go through my day
Emptiness filling the way
Will this feeling ever dissipate
I have nothing to hope for so I just wait
For an imaginary savior called fate

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Life is something you do day by day
Whenever you cannot go on
Just remember what I say
It's not about how far you've gone
It's about finding the warmth on the way

You need to find what gives you strength
Something that will help you achieve great length
Something that will assist you in your endeavors
A permanent support forever and ever
For whenever you feel under the weather

After all what is a life worth if it is denied warmth
I can tell you from experience it is like the city of Corinth
You can feel like you have an unshakable base
But up from under the difficulty you cannot face
Will undoubtedly arise, and take you from that place

This is why I am telling you
To forget about what they say
You need to find that warmth
Hold on to it and let none take it away
It's the only way to keep nothingness at bay
I implore you to make your life not one to be mourn'th


With love,

The forlorn


Tuesday, August 30, 2011

The music flows through my veins
The only thing that numbs the pain
From living in a world so vain
A single string keeping me sane
Logic binds me like a chain
Something so useless and plain
I wished for the rhythmic rain
To dance down and brighten my day
It never came
Truly a shame

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Depression

I was certain that I found my calling
It turned out to be a cruel prank
A trick so cold and appalling
My psyche was holed and sank
Forced to fold into an endless void
Reality on hold, a life toyed
Desperate and destroyed

Monday, August 8, 2011

I need somewhere to belong
Death won't take long
Heaven denied my application
My message was lost in translation
I am too evil even though I am God's creation
So I gave up on the false god and turned to Satan
Even Hell won't take me
Even the devil forsake me
I would rip him apart
Hang his entrails as a piece of art
For now I will roam
Home to home
Showing everyone
How my world is run

Sunday, August 7, 2011

All through my life
Longing for a healing light
For someone to confide
For somewhere to reside
It seems those are hard to find
So I drift through the night
Not a kindred soul in sight
I turn to myself for an answer
Perhaps I caused my life's cancer
For now I stay in the shadow
The lonely man's manifesto
Who knows where I might go
I used to just follow the flow
But it led to an ocean of emptiness
So now I fight my way back upstream
Searching for a way out of this tempest
Wishing reality was just a fleeting dream
Wishing this world wasn't obscenely mean
Time to keep moving
I don't want to be seen

Friday, August 5, 2011

Love is something
I thought I was above
I felt I was tough
I suppose not enough
I feel I am missing
Part of my being
A feeling you can't explain
No joy and no pain
Is more painful
Than everything ever
If I can't feel love
Will I ever know life
Should I end it now
To know paradise

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Life

Worrying about life
Seems like such a bore
Who cares if they avoid light
I am not tasked with that chore
Time is a fickle thing
Always ticking and ticking
A valuable commodity
If it exists at all
Pointless philosophical debate
Never seems to dissipate
Let others find their own light
As I found mine
Perhaps a shadow is not a shadow
Instead it is the son of the night
Who is to say which has more might
Maybe this realization does not occur
For all the fright it may incur
A subjective world
A beautiful mural
Independent thought
A forever changing plot
A beautiful randomness
A gentle touch
Nothing amiss
Life is such
Never thought it would come to this
Never thought I would be one to miss
Perhaps I am human after all
Not just an impervious wall
I am unsure of what to pursue
The world feels so construed
After seeing the truth
The world seems so aloof
I halfheartedly believe
I am without reprieve
Strong urge to leave
Was never one to reconcile
Forced to face my trial

Monday, July 11, 2011

Meaning

My psyche an addict
A mind of tragic
Unnameable emotion
Lack of commotion
The searing cold burns
An unfortunate turn
Leaving me outside
A dangerous ride
I must confide

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Please stop being scared
I thought you were prepared?
Welcome to my world
Let me take you for a twirl
I cant wait to see you scream
My eternal dream
Your mortal destiny
Pleases me immensely

Monday, May 23, 2011

I am colour blind
All I see is grey
I wish I could rewind time
To review the colourful day
But I march on
A colourless parade
A cruel pawn
Without aid

Friday, April 15, 2011

Come, feel my pain
Killed you, a train
But for me a day
Being quite grey
Being all I know
Cannot show
What I crow
So often
Murder

Friday, April 1, 2011

Sleep deprived
World contrived
Life despised
Swimming in lies
I hear peoples cries
I hear peoples sighs
Why wont we fight?
We only want what's right
Our whole race is a plight
So I escape into the night
It's only an escape
A temporary trait, too late

Saturday, March 19, 2011

The Modern World

I will not submit
I will not tolerate the pain
That comes with being a slave
Follow the money
It will show you the end of the world is coming
Or maybe the beginning
It all depends on who is winning
Those in the lead just happen
To be the ones who mislead
The ones in charge
Are the ones who charge you
They keep you in fear
To keep you here
No time to relax you need to
Pay your taxes
Fax your faxes
Ignore your feelings
Pretend that nothing is lack lust

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Negative Slope

I can feel it slipping
My sanity is dripping
Into an endless void
Nearly destroyed
Somehow keep going
Albeit my pace is slowing
Negativity is abundant
Everyone is redundant

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Why?

They say we live our lives in quiet desperation
Well I think I'm someone who just doesn't have the patience
Waking up everyday just to do it again
Waiting and waiting for it to all end
Maybe I should take the easy way out
Run away from life,rout
They say I have potential
And that I should be grateful
But all I see is a pointless life, wasteful
No emotion, just a flatline
Feeling empty all the time
But who knows?
Maybe I'm already dying.